Once in a while, despite all the prejudice against father custody and the sanctification of the single mother, the occasional unmistakable, unavoidable refutation pops up. Here's a real keeper. The American military has discovered, no surprise, that the incidence of child abuse rises significantly when dad has been deployed away from home, but, and here's the kicker, when it's mom who's deployed "the effect [...] on the likelihood of abuse or neglect was insignificant".
Did you get that? Dad goes away to war and mom takes it out on the kids - the likelihood triples! But when mom's away and the kids stay with dad, he's no more likely to abuse them than if she'd stayed.
Of course, it's no surprise at all that the article blows off dad's restraint by explicitly claiming he must be getting more support from elsewhere and poor, victim mom isn't, left bereft and on her own, but this is nothing in the face of the bare fact of the study.
Now I wonder what happens in the aftermath of divorce, eh?
Did you get that? Dad goes away to war and mom takes it out on the kids - the likelihood triples! But when mom's away and the kids stay with dad, he's no more likely to abuse them than if she'd stayed.
Of course, it's no surprise at all that the article blows off dad's restraint by explicitly claiming he must be getting more support from elsewhere and poor, victim mom isn't, left bereft and on her own, but this is nothing in the face of the bare fact of the study.
Now I wonder what happens in the aftermath of divorce, eh?
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4 comments:
Okay, here's my comment then.
I'm not going through a divorce, nor am I a child of divorce and I personally haven't experienced that particular brand of abuse, however, I would have to say that although the statistics surprised me, they didn't shock me.
I know of quite a few instances from meeting people that have suffered at the hands of their parents, that the culprit in these instances has most often been the mother.
And we're not even talking about situations where the father is away overseas, leaving the wife and kids alone for months at a time (that is not an excuse for any women to abuse their kids incidentally).
I think that most people generally associate abused children with abusive fathers, because for most, it's a generalised view point that men are the more likely to be violent, cruel, sadistic etc etc.
It's also easier for them to believe that a man is more capable of hurting their child than the 'mother', the 'meek' women of doing the same. People who have read highly publicised autobiographies of people who have been abused in the past, will know this is bullshit!
Having, in a previous life, studied domestic abuse where the abusive partner has been the women, I would agree that we women can be sadistic, evil bitches just as much as men can be sadistic, evil bastards. I also think it is hugely unfair for courts to, as a matter of course, generally give custody of children in divorce proceedings, to the mother........the sex of an individual does not make that person an automatically good, loving and kind parent...but the actions.
So to round off this HUGELY long comment (you did ask for it though), I'd say that as a women and a mother, when I read of a case where children are being torn from a loving father (in some cases when they have lived with him solely for the last several years)and are given to the care of a woman purely because she's a woman, and knowing what I do through friendships I have made.....I feel sick to my stomach and pray to whoever's listening that the woman whose care they have been given into, is not the twisted, sick, territorial bitch, she'll most likely turn out to be!
Men and women are BOTH capable of doing horrible things to themselves, each other and their children and ultimately I'd have to say that my sympathy lies with the kids.
There you go....not only a comment but a bloody essay!!!
just one more piece of 'evidence' indicating that women are not the MYTH of 'sugar and spice and everything nice' that our laws are currently based upon.
The laws are clearly biased against men and this data shows it.
Isn't it amazing! And these are military wives! Imagine how atrociously all the rest of them behave.
-Dick
What's new about this?
Every study on child abuse that is even the slightest bit honest about it shows that mothers are the leading abusers of children in every form of abuse except sexual - and that's only because no one ever bothers to ask the kids if mommy sexually abuses them because the myth of men as sex crazed fiends is still strongly in place.
Yet, we still every day get child protection agencies touting crime statistics showing males are PROSECUTED in something like 98 cases of child abuse out of every 100 claiming that to be the truth.
But that's merely because we do not prosecute women very often for any kind of crime and probably least of all for child abuse.
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