"This is in regards to the story you wrote regarding Extradition worry for family as FBI puts mum on 'most wanted' list. There are always two sides to a story. I would like the chance to share the “other” side of the story. I am ready to speak out and am amazed that no one has sought out any answers from the other side of this article. I am the sister of John Clark. I was Eileen Sams Clark sister in law and I was also a bridesmaid at their wedding. The article discussed about my sister in law and my niece and nephews is a huge distorted mistruth. The picture posted in the Daily Telegraph and now in your newspaper of Eileen, Hayden and Chandler is the first time in fifteen years my brother, my parents,( Chandler, Rebekah and Hayden's grandparent's), my brother Clay and I have seen of them.
First of all, Eileen Sams Clark has been on the FBI's wanted list for kidnapping and parental interference for almost the full 15 years since her abduction of my brothers children. Extraditing an American Citizen that broke US laws should be a simple procedure. Unfortunately, it appears that my sister in law and her advisors are using a political issue to try and help her AGAIN avoid due process here in the United States. Please do not misunderstand my intentions here. This specific extradition regarding my former sister in law is not about a British Citizen being extradited to America. This specific extradition regarding Eileen Sams Clark is about a US citizen, with a 15 year warrant out for her arrest being returned to America to face consequences of her actions. Eileen entered the UK because she was fleeing justice here in the United States. She was fully aware of all charges against her. Eileen entered a foreign country in order to FLEE prosecution. I believe, in my understanding that that means she is most likely in your country without proper documentation. Charges against Eileen were dropped in 2004 because the first grand jury transcripts mysteriously "disappeared". Two months later the State of New Mexico reissued the same exact warrant for her arrest. Her story so far was only a half truth.
To this day, my brother and our family do not know why Eileen "fled" and kept the children from my brother. No one seems to ask Eileen the question that has haunted me and my family for years, “If she was so unhappy and so distraught, why didn't she just divorce my brother?" All Eileen had to do was file for divorce, share custody with my brother and everyone could have moved on in their lives.
Unlike the Daily Telegraph article, your interview with Eileen explains that Eileen fled my brother because”she was too scared to remain in her marriage to husband John Clark when she left her New Mexico home in 1995." I cannot pretend to know what was ever truly in the mind of my sister in law. All I know is that my brother has been through a thorough background check from the FBI and the US Attorney’s office and there is no record of abuse whatsoever!
In your article, it stated, "In 2009, on the advice of lawyers, Mrs. Clark’s sons Chandler, now 23, and Hayden, 20, contacted the Santa Fe Police Department to say they were not missing, but living safely and happily with their mother in the UK." This did happen. The local police station was approached and given information. For some reason, and we truly do not know why, this police officer went into the NCIC system and took Chandler and Hayden out of the system. The person that was contacted in Santa Fe police department had NO authority to remove anyone from the NCIC (missing children) list. The officer was presented with a formal letter. He never saw or observed Chandler or Hayden. For all he knew the guy down the street could have produced the exact same information. In order to have had the kids name removed, they would have had to appear with proper documentation, to the FBI and prove they were who they said they were. Their attempt to remove their names from the list could have been resolved if they had actually contacted the actual authorities that needed to be informed. Later, through attorneys for Hayden and Chandler, it was proposed to my brother that if he were to drop the charges against Eileen, he could then have the ability to be in contact with Chandler and Hayden.
Throughout this ordeal is the consistent pattern of Eileen Sams Clark using the children as a wedge between her and my brother.
What is so painful to realize for my family is the fact that any opportunity to have a decent relationship with these three children has been taken away. None of this had to happen. Eileen Sams Clark perpetrated this chain of events. All of this could have been resolved simply.
My brother and Eileen were never formally divorced. My brother sought a divorce by abstention here in the US. That means that because Eileen was "in hiding" and could not be located, my brother had to post advertisements in the legal sections of local newspapers where he thought she might hide and post his intentions to legally divorce her because she abandoned the marriage. This took a year to legally accomplish. There was never ANY joint custody decided through a divorce at all. My brother was never sure that Eileen even knew that they were legally divorced until he confronted Eileen's father through the Dr. Phil show in 2005.
We have hoped for years of wishing to share a holiday with ALL of us together. We have always looked forward to having an opportunity to knowing my brothers children. Speaking just for myself, I would love them to meet my sons and to share pictures and videos we have of them when they were young. We are a decent law abiding family. We wish this could find an end and we might be able to reconnect with the children.
My family is like most families. We value family and the strength you get from that family.
My former sister in law has broken many laws. There are consequences for her decision to do what she did. My former sister in law has family members that are attorneys. She was and still is, fully aware of the consequences of her actions. Much of the information given to you in this article by her is inaccurate and flat out untrue.
My parents and I have remained silent all of this time with the great hope that we might be able to reunite with my brother’s children. My former sister in law has made so many false accusations that it is hard to keep them straight. Because Eileen has chosen to USE the political climate to fight extradition for wrongs she knew she perpetrated is unacceptable to my parents and me. My brother seeks to reunite and connect with his children. Unfortunately, to do that, his ex wife has to face the charges against her. Eileen is no victim here. My brother and the three children are the victims. I can only imagine the untruths she has told these three young adults. They have only had her to rely upon for all these years. Of course they will come to her defense, just as most children would. These three children were much to young to remember anything of their father when they were cruelly separated from him.
After all this time, I wish things for everyone concerned could have been different. My parents and I still would love the opportunity to reach out to these young adults and learn about their lives. We would relish the chance to share our lives with them. Their cousins would love the same opportunity as well."
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Eileen Clark, the other side of the story
A few days ago, I posted the Telegraph story on Eileen Clark to my news stream. I found it so typically one sided of them - a woman kidnaps her children, separating them from their father for 15 years and now a major paper comes to her defense once she is finally caught. The other side's story was painfully absent, despite an appearance on Dr. Phil some years ago. Today, however, that side is to be found in eloquent form in the comment section of an article in the Oxford Mail. I copy it here in its entirety because it speaks volumes about how a mother can twist the law, politics and the media to suit her own purposes regardless of what is right or legal:
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26 comments:
Dear Just Another Disenfranchised Father.. Thank you, Thank you and more thank you's. Thank you for posting my remarks I made in the Oxford Mail regarding the other side of a kidnapping story regarding my former sister in law Eileen Clark. My family has been silent all these years with the hope that the justice system would prevail and that the truth would prevail. Because my former sister in law has now come forward publicly my parents and I want Chandler, Hayden and Rebekah to know that we would love an opportunity to know them and reunite with them. 15 years of silence is a long time. The pain that was perpetrated on my brother and our family has been a long standing one. When Eileen took the children and disappeared, they left behind the family dog Amos. As Amos aged, my father began to care for him because my brother was working so very much. Amos never left my fathers side. Amos finally passed away and truly that was the last living rememberance my brother had of the children. Amos' passing was a painful reminder to my whole family of the lives we were missing. Comprehending this ridiculous forced seperation instigated by my former sister in law has never made any sense to us. I don't think it ever will. All we care about now is trying to start from this point and get to know the almost grown children. We are not intent on punishing anyone. We would just like a resolution. Laws have been broken. There are always consequences to broken laws.
My family has watched my brother John struggle to keep this search alive and when it looked like things would come to an unpleasnt end,somehow, divine guidance stepped in. I see you as one of those devine guidance's. You are welcome to post this and let others out there,who have missing children know, that there is strength in family and in friends. I now consider you a friend.
Again, thank you. Please contact me if you have any questions and I would love to hear from you.
All the best to you, Shug
Hi Shug,
You're entirely welcome. Your brother and I have more in common than might be immediately apparent. I wish him all the best in his efforts to reunite with his children.
As regards understanding the perpetrator, I can only say that in this day and age, it is often difficult to differentiate between evil and sickness. Sickness you treat, evil you fight. If you cannot treat, you can only fight.
JD
I just watched the Dr. Phil show 2010 version. I can't shake the feeling that this guy is lying about why she might have left. It takes two to tango. Polygraph about physical abuse cleared, great. He still could have emotionally abused her and used control on her until she snapped and never laid an innocent hand on her. She just started sleeping in another room? She was distant and silent but he had no clue what was up? In a loving, nurturing relationship you would see it. Too prideful maybe? He said OTHER people started to see she was losing it and making comments about her and her mental state. Really? and YOU had no clue and no role.
She should not have taken the kids, it's illegal and wrong and I started to feel for him at the end of the show. He seemed sincere about wanting to see his kids. But at the beginning, in my opinion, he was lying when he said he had no clue what happened. I do not believe he does not know why!
In a followup to my anonymous comments on John Clark probably knowing why his wife left.
On her comment in a UK article: "My children are articulate, proud young people. But if I have to go back, well, it's going to undermine them so much. There will be so many things to sort out. I don't know if I'll ever be able to come back."
That comment by Eileen Clark is messed up! She sounds a bit full of herself (narcissistic really) like they couldn't live without her influence. Well frankly if it undermines them she can really only blame herself and not the extradition.
What a mess.
Wow! Is about all I can say. I find it out so absurd and makes me sick at how they make this woman out to be some saint or has done nothing wrong. I know a child who has been subjected to parental alienation. I am pretty sure Mr. Clark's children will have suffered some of the same effects. I can't imagine what they must think or feel and all I have to say is that eventually the truth will come out. She will have to face what she has done and I really think the kids will come around. We can all imagine what it must feel like to have all of this thrown at you, all the mixed emotions they must be feeling. No matter how this woman may have felt at the time it gave her NO RIGHT!! Whatsoever, to take those children from their father and their family and to alienate and lie to them all of these years. There is no excuse she can give. I pray for your family Shug and I really hope that the kids will see the light at the end of that dark tunnel they are in now and see how much they are missed and loved. Eileen needs to be held responsible for her actions and to show the rest of the parents who have done this, are doing this now or who plan to take off with their children, that this is not what needs to happen. The fact that in one of these comments or articles I have read it states that we here in the US think of our children as property. Grow up you moron! Eileen has been the one treating them as HER property!!! We don't treat our children as property! Parents have rights to be with their children, to watch them grow up and learn and become the people they are, Mr. Clark HAD RIGHTS and no matter how this ends, he can NEVER get that back nor can his children!!
Dear Anonymous:
My brother had NO idea why my former sister in law decided to flee the house and never return. Eileen is still the mother of my nephews and neice. What we belive to be the facts and knew the truth are two different things. My brother is not hiding or lying about anything. Most people believe that persons that abduct their own kids MUST have a reason. If you look at the second story that was also offered on the Jan. 4th Dr Phil show about parental abductions, with Deanna, her father had no "reason" to abduct but selfish goals and personal animosity for his ex wife. Because society has become so determined to find fault and blame in just about everything, we chose to believe that everyone must have a rational and "real" reason to do what they do. My brother provided aid, support and care for Eileen when it was offered and needed. Unfortunately, people that need the most help usually refuse it or do not want to ask for it. Blaming a person for someone's illness does not seem reasonable. Pride had nothing to do with Eileen separating the children from my brother. Selfishness and irrational thinking did.
My brother did the best he could to be a good husband, good father and good provider. In his refusal to stop searching for those children, he has found some solace. Two of the three kids spent Christmas with him this past holiday. They are still with him as I write this. He has helped to secure their new passports and has been reconnecting with them since November. We hope the third sibling will eventually want a relationship as well. One thing I do know, the article written in the telegraph was very twisted, on sided and parts not actually true. They did reconnect with my brother and they did want to do so. That was not what the article said.
Now that the kids are in my brother’s life again, I want to help protect them and their reconnecting with our family. After all, that is really what matters. The truth does come out in the end. This blog is a good blog with an unusually unheard of side to pay attention toward.
I thank John Doe for starting it, writing about it and sharing his obviously very painful story. I hope your story ends with some happiness and pleasure. 15 years, 50, years……. Don’t give up the hope, the attempts to reunite or even keep that one light in the window glowing for that child. Happy New Year! It has started well for the Clark Family!
Whew - I just watched the Dr. Phil show in Europe - we get things at random times - and I was mystified as to how in the world the guy could get divorced and remarried if he had literally not heard from the woman in 15 years. Fortunately a google search yielded this blog post which answered my question. Yeah, I probably need a hobby if I'm getting that curious about stuff that has nothing to do with me. But thanks.
Those two people John and Eileen know what really happened. I tried to do the right thing by my daughter with her father and keep her separated from my divorcing him and I wanted to make sure that she and her father had a relationship, but that even back fired on me as he used her in an attempt to manipulate me.
Someone asked why did this Eileen person just divorce? Well I guess for the same reasons men and women who cheat do not divorce first, but cheat and then say that htey could not help themselves.
Life for all would be so much better if we treated people the way we want to be treated and loved God.
The kids do not need to suffer any more than they already have-so someone needs to do what is best for them. Solomon might advise to leave the mother alone what done is done, but allow the children to hear the other side of hte story from their dad and leave it open for them to see him. They are grown now what about not disrupting thier life but maybe even visiting them on their turf and building a relationship from there. The hurt is there, now its time to love them above the hurt of evil that is done. I hope this ends well.
That awful woman better spend the rest of her days rotting in a jail cell. What she has done is so far beyond acceptable it's disgusting. She does not deserve anything beyond four sealed walls and a cot. Those poor children and their father. Thank God they now have a chance to reconnect! Good work to all who made this reunion possible. Shame on you, Eileen! What a selfish, shameful excuse for a woman you are!
I just read all of this. I was divorced 16 years ago. My ex tried to separate me from my children fortunately the courts would not side with the lies she could not prove. Unfortunately when someone accuse a man of abuse it is usually readily believed. Fortunately the judge made my ex answer point blank if "she had ever seen me be violent in all the years she had known me?" Her answer was "No." She was then informed she could be tried for filing a false report under oath. Women do this all of the time, they separate kids from parents. They get custody and often legally move, when there is no reason other than to raise the child on their on. It is nothing short of abuse and kidnapping. I hope the courts make an example of her and put her in jail for the rest of her life. And any other parent father or mother who play this game. Good luck, to John and his children.
I just watched the February 4th Dr. Phil show (quite by accident as I haven't watched it in years) and I couldn't stop watching it!!!!! Fantastic story, what an ending! So happy for all of the Clark family. I was wondering, during the show, if Mr. Clark's parents where still alive to see this day as I didn't hear him mention them during the show.
Warmed my heart today to hear this story and I am happy for all. I really do hope that Mr. Clark will eventually be in touch with his daughter also.
I have just read the Telegraph article. I don't find it slanted. The mother comes off as a bon fide nut job.
The human right advocate is not much better.
The first thing I thought when I saw the clark story on the Dr Phil show Febuary 4th 2011 was My god she has ruined four lives and will get away with it. If anybody wants to know the truth of a thin just look at who benefits from the action and the truth will be reveled. The only one benefiting from this horror story is Eileen even the little girl will someday feel pain over what has occurred. Not Eileen unless she is punished for breaking the law she will just go on not even noticing the complete destruction she's leaving in her wake. I know nothing about her or Mr Clark just what I have seen and read but I know enough about human nature to infer that her motive was to inflect pain on Mr Clark. The was she did what she did were the actions of a woman hating a man. Yes many women have to leave in that same way to insure their childrens protection. She ,however never claimed that he was harming her children only herself. I have been in that situation all you want to do is get yourself away from him once that is accomplished unless he is violent their is no danger to the children. No matter what she says, seeing him with his new wife and how gentle he is with his children any mental health professional could see she is far less then truthful. People who hurt other people are only interested in one person themselves. The facts tell the whole story. A woman that runs to another country to keep her children to herself and a man who spends fifteen years and a lot of money just for a small glimpse of his children, or anything they are willing to give him. He doesn,t insist the underage girl be returned to him. He doesn,t guilt the boys into moving back with him. All he does now as in the past is want what is best for them. Except now he adds what will make them happiest. I am so sorry for all those hurt by this monster. The sadist thing of all she will go to her grave not even knowing or caring what harm she has done. I have only one suggestion for Mr Clark, If he really wants to see her punished for her crimes he should contact Bill O'Reilly no matter what you think of his show or politics he gets things done and he loves to wright wrongs. Best of all to the Clark family.
Yours truly
ended better
All I can say is that this Eileen woman sounds nuts. If she was REALLY in any danger, she'd go to the police...Not flee from the country. Some people are just rediculous thinking this man was abusive. I cant say he is or isn't but her fleeing the country saying he [John] "abused" her sounds childish and a big fat lie. I feel sorry for the British Government because they have to deal with this unstable woman who is abusing their laws. Of course Britian will blame us... This is such a simple and stupid and sad case of course no one wants to take responsibility...so they point fingers.. such mature people and governments. If John was really that abusive dont y'all think his current wife would have filed something or Dr. Phil would have figured this out by now. There is nothing. Eileen needs help and I feel sorry for her to an extent. What she did was wrong and she needs to stop acting childish and putting blame on others (there is a psychological term for her--martyr). GROW UP Eileen and let your kids know their father and let them decide for themselves. Given certain circumstances I think both parents need to figure this out in a mature and in the least invasive manner for the sake of their children. Perhaps Eileen be sent back to US and have a psychiatric eval before being put in jail or prision and maybe probation and fines so she pays but the children arent really effected. We have to think of the kids here. Eileen shouldn't get off scott free (frankly I think there is something mentally wrong with her thinking and making sense of things) and John shouldn't have to suffer and the kids should not be involved in any way... I feel for the kids.
i believe this women should be brought back to the US and face her criminal charges Had this been a man stealin his children it would have been done immediately, I think what Elieen did was hidious and selfish. Shame on you Eileen you may rot in hell for this. Sincerely Brandy
Cant help believing that there are 2 sides to every story!!ai
I just watched the Dr. Phil show and just wanted to say, what Eileen did was wrong in every way, if she was abused in anyway which I personally think she was, she should've taken different steps rather to steal a very important part of the childrens life. She denied them their right to choose. There was definately something odd about John, can't put my finger on it, but he is not all innocent in this matter as he portrait it to be.
Hi,
I live in Australia and just watched John Clark reunited with his kids, on the Dr Phil show (aired 27/05/2011). My heart goes out to John and his kids. I just can not understand as a woman how any mother could deprive her kids from their father for so long and believe Eileen should be punished for her actions. I would love to see John reconnect with his daughter and be a whole family again.
I would be grateful with any reply but would love to know how the family are doing and if or when the family are all back together and keep relationships with each other.
I understand the Clark family may want their privacy and no more interviews or media attention as I cannot find any more information other than the 4th of February’s interview. If this is the case, please no reply is necessary.
I would appreciate if my comment was not shown as I will send my email address to you.
I hope that the Clark family now have brighter days ahead and leave the darkness behind them.
All the best,
-Katrina Roberts
Miss_Kat86only@hotmail.com
Just watched Dr Phil show and was so moved by the reunion of John and his two gorgeous sons. I sincerely hope he gets the chance to build a relationship with his daughter Rebekah. That will truely be a happy ending. As for his ex wife I have no idea as to what went on back in the past but her actions were totally unacceptable, however incarcerating her will only alienate her kids whom have suffered enough.
Sharon
I have just watched that Dr Phil show and cannot believe how similar my story is to theres. I was born in America and my mother left there with my brother and I when we where babies to return to Ireland. She was married to my father and left because she was in an abusive relationship. My mother has never had a bad word to say about him and has always been completely honest with myself and my brother. The difference is, my father knew where we were and never made the effort to contact us. I am 23 now and after watching that show it has spurred me on to make contact with him. And i can only hope that one day i will get to meet him if he wants to. I feel for both sides of this dispute, i only had my mother to rely on when i was a child and she could have very easily lied to us but she didnt.
I think it is great now that both Hayden and Chandler have been reunited with their father. and maybe one day Rebekah may want to get to know him also. I only can wish that my father was as determined as John Clark is. I wish everyone involved all the best.
I personally think Eileen should be thrown in prison for her crimes that is a worthkless thing a human could do to thier children that just shows how sorry of a parent she is. It's a shame you have to brain wash your children because your the unfit parent
I cannot image the pain and suffering that John Clark, his parents, siblings, nieces and nephews have gone through because of the selfishness and flat out meanness of one woman, Eileen. She not only has caused unimaginable pain and suffering for this family but she has stolen emotionally and physically from her 3 children. She has deprived her children of their father, of their grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. In a sense she has stolen their identity. She stole family traditions, loving memories and the list goes on and on. She changed the path of her children’s lives. She deprived them of people they would have or could have met in their journey through life if they had been even partially raised and guided by their father. She has added insult to injury by lying and shows her true character and moral standing by doing so. Not only that but she has the chance now to release her children from the emotional chaos she has caused them by telling the truth now and has chosen not to do so. I question her love for them. You would think that true love would over- rule selfishness at some point but with Eileen it has not. Because of her self-centeredness, cowardly and criminal act she should be brought to justice and punished as a kidnapper as any other criminal who has broken the law. She should serve no less than the years that she has stolen from all involved. She has had 15 years to make this right and has not. Her family members who knew where she was, also has had 15 years to make it right and have not. They as well should also face charges for their criminal act of aiding and abetting a known criminal. They too are no different than any other criminal who has done this. She chose to allow another man to raise and guide her children physically and emotionally. And even if he was a good man and good to the children, he was not their father. John Clark was and is and will always be their father. God chose him as their father and she had now right to ignor it. Eileen Clark should pay recompense for the horrible and monstrous damage she had done to all involved. Shame on her.
I only just viewed the 2010 Dr Phil show.
I too was kidnapped by my mother, along with my older brother, when I was just 5 1/2 years old.
I was born in the U.K. My father was a doctor. My mother worked for the BBC. When I was a toddler, my mother divorced my father, left us and moved to the U.S.
There was a restraining order preventing her from taking us, but that did not stop her.
When I was 5 1/2; during recess at school in Scotland, my mother abducted both my brother and myself and brought us to the United States.
I never saw my home, my friends, or my dog, Yogi, again. I came to the U.S. with only the school uniform I was wearing when I was abducted.
Sure, there was an ongoing (5-year)custody battle, which for some reason took place in the U.S., not the U.K., and my dad was eventually forced to leave everything and everyone behind in order to fight for us in the U.S. courts.
No charges were brought against my mother!!
What's wrong with this picture? My mother first abandoned us, then kidnapped us (twice - the first effort (six months earlier) was thwarted by British police at the airport).
British government did nothing to have us brought back to the U.K. - even tho she broke the law. I would like to believe that if this happened today, we'd have been returned to my father in the U.K. immediately, but in the early 60s, a woman pretty much had to commit murder to be prosecuted.
My brother and I were told stories of abuse, etc and letters from my father were intercepted (which I only realized much later and don't believe my father ever relized was going on).
My father was a virtual stranger to me and it wasn't until my late 20s; early 30s that I began to research the kidnapping and realized how much my father had loved us - to give up his life and follow us to the U.S.
I so regret, once I was old enough to drive, not developing a true father-daughter relationship. The year after I was married, my father passed away from cancer. I felt I never really knew him and never knew of or met any of my paternal family.
This past year, with the help of the Internet and Facebook, I have located many family members I never knew of.
My mother is alive (in her 80s) and is exhibiting more of the mental illness that was clearly always present (for her to kidnap her children and have absolutely no remorse whatsoever; disconnect from every member of her own family (mother, father, sister, etc) and I cannot help but be resentful for her robbing me of a family (beyond she, my brother, and my step-father).
I also find myself with extreme feelings of guilt and regret over not seeing through the manipulation and pursuing a relationship with my dad.
It would be my hope that Rebekah will make a real effort to get to know her father - before it's too late for her too.
I would love to know if Rebekah changed her mind and met her father...such a sad story...
The father's case is greatly undermined by his relentless determination to seek revenge. If I were one of these children, I would NEVER forgive him for trying to put my mother in prison.
No woman walks away without a reason. The fact that he "doesn't know" is pathetic. She says abuse and he feigns ignorance? Please!! I don't buy his story.
If the father really cared about his children, he would just leave them alone. He has found out that they are safe--now just go away!! You are obviously not wanted and trying to put the mother in jail? I can see why they don't want the father around.
What a sad story for the kids.
btw, I am female. My mother also left my father due to abuse and lived in hiding for most of her life. She never spoke ill of him. I got to know my father as an adult and formed my own opinion.
I do not agree with you this time but I do agree with most of everything you do and fully understand the injustices fathers suffer.
However, The family court system in the US is fraught with injustice, only a small amount of research will turn up dozens of cases where both fathers and mothers alike have suffered as a result. Even to the point where children have been taken in to care, only to be abused there.
Personally and you may not like this, but in this case, I am glad the children are now grown up!
Yes there has been an injustice against the father, no doubt, but the system over there, would probably not have rectified that anyway.
Handing her over to the US injustice system serves no purpose other than to feed a set of ravenous wolves and the bloated ego's of the judges and lawyers who I can already sense are drooling and rubbing their hands together at the thought of this case.
Sliepnir2006
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