Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Sires, dams and the pop culture of insemination

I couldn't make this stuff up, I really couldn't. It's high farce.

Here's a a popular sperm donor. With 11 foals to his name, sire 401 (as he's called) "is 6 foot 4, of German heritage, has a master's degree, is athletic and is very close to his mother". That last bit is apparently one of those things that "most women couldn't walk away from" which, of course, presumes that "most women" are profoundly superficial, but otherwise, doesn't one get nasty flashes of phrases like "master race"? I bet he's blonde.

The article finishes up observing that the "mothers are in touch by phone and e-mail and hope to have a grand reunion someday with all the siblings. They post baby pictures on a private message board and recently have begun posting health developments and histories of the kids for reference."

This sire has a harem! Can't you just imagine it? A room full of women and children of various ages. The children all look eerily alike and are vaguely wary of each other as they're all each other's half brothers and sisters, but none of them know their common father. And the mothers, what will they talk about? The only thing they'll have in common is their "independence" which will doubtless be ferociously and mutually defended. Irony doesn't even begin to describe it.

But "They also want to make it very clear that in signing up on the site, they were not looking for a husband or a relationship, and they are not romanticizing about the donor." In which case, why do they feel the need to make their own little community?

Hmmm. Come to think of it, if I were "401" I'd be worried, a gaggle of women like that are bound to have their curiosity take over their sense at some point and with the increasing prevelance of DNA testing, I'm sure it'll not take long to find him. Run, sire 401! Run!

I swear, I couldn't make this stuff up!

(It'd be the icing on the cake if "401" were in fact short, swarthy and hated his mom!)

1 comment:

a psychiatrist who learned from veterans said...

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